Wednesday, April 18, 2007

pondering true love in the a.m.

it is a late night again.

for no reason really. i was at the library past midnight, but now it is 3:49 and in between getting ready for bed and finishing Pride and Prejudice, hours past and here i am with two cans of diet coke and a tall cup of coffee in my system that is currently keeping me quite awake.

i am meeting with my boon taylor in 4 hours. 8 o'clock a.m. i love wednesday mornings. there is something about pursuing the day that is rather responsible. i like being responsible, considering that it doesn't happen too often.

The movie tonight reminded me of a Donald Miller quote:

"i heard once that real love doesnt ask what is in it for me; it just gives unconditionally. it just tries to take the weight out of somebody else's pack, lessen his load, and if it gets reciprocated, that's great, but that isnt what you did it for."- Through Painted Deserts

In the movie, Mr. Darcy goes out of his way to take the load off of the Bennet family...or to directly quote "take the weight out of somebody else's pack, lessen his load..."He states later in the movie that, "surely you must know, i did it all for you" as he was speaking to Miss Elizabeth. He was not expecting a response or a reaction. He simply did these things out of love. True Love. He was not in it for himself, but only for the betterment of her life.

Love that is true. Will i ever know it? Shall i ever comprehend its depth. It seems to be a beautiful thing to give, give, give out of love and expect not ONE thing in return...Oh to love someone so much that you would do anything for them and that alone would be enough...that alone would be fulfilling. One day.

Until then, i shall learn to love unconditionally. Not thinking, "what's in it for me" or any other selfish motives but to love wholeheartedly - a divine interaction with my thoughts and my actions shall allow my loving to be easier. For Jesus loved reguardless. I have conditional tendencies, but with the help of the spirit, i can experience True Love.

it is now 4:02. i am going to attempt to sleep. sleep deep to my mind. oh yes :)

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